Love and Love Deeply

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The saying goes that you cannot love another until you learn to love yourself. I, however, would argue the opposite: you can't learn to love yourself until you learn to love another. This love can be romantic, platonic, or familial--it does not matter. What matters is that we love and love deeply.

We are always harder on ourselves than we are on others. We see ourselves in harsh light and distorted mirrors. During the day we hide from being noticed, and at night we quietly loathe our bodies and our minds. We hold ourselves accountable for every mistake, every situation that arises. We blame our bodies for not being what we want them to be. We hate ourselves for much of our lives.

But with friends, the reality is different. We see them for who they are, loving them in spite of their flaws. We see their beauty. We see the light radiating from their souls. The love we feel for them is forever.

Now imagine if we were to show ourselves the same love we so readily give others. Imagine if we forgave ourselves for making a mistake or forgave our bodies for not being what we wanted them to be. Imagine if we loved ourselves even more for it. Would we see ourselves in a better light? Would our self-love increase exponentially? I believe the answer to both questions is yes.

So, no, don't reject love because your self-hatred is running rampant. Give love and receive love in return. Learn how to love another and use it to learn to love yourself.

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